What just happened? Is it a dream? Or maybe a nightmare. I wasn’t fully prepared for what happened, even though I wanted it to happen. But maybe not like this. Did I even consent to this or was I just raped by the man who will be living in my apartment? And if it was rape, how is it possible that it turns me on so much?

My thoughts were, as always, my greatest enemy. He zoned out completely and later fell asleep as if I wasn’t still there and as if he hasn’t (ab)used me the way he did. I went out to my Church and did a confession to the priest who reluctantly granted me my absolution. I’ve spent an hour or more just praying, maybe not for absolution, but for the guidance and strength to endure the attraction that I’ve felt for this entire situation. Never in my life, before Samer have I had any sorts of dominatrix situations, or whatever the hell this was. And they haven’t even attracted me, not one bit! But now, all I can think about is his hard cock and the way he made me feel insignificant and objectified. In a way, I have found a new part of myself. Well, he found it actually.

The next morning I snuck out of the apartment a bit earlier and went to work. For the first time in my life, I was at work an entire hour earlier. Actually, the work calmed me a bit and made me feel more focused, which ultimately helped me to understand what happened last night: I ate Muslim dick and I liked it.

It’s an early afternoon and I’m back to the apartment with some groceries that I picked on my way home. Here goes nothing I guess, our first post-blowjob conversation. I enter the apartment and he greets me with the sweetest smile.

Samer: hello my friend, I just finished with my noon prayer and I am so glad that you are home. How was your work today?

Me: well, I was actually really motivated to be there for the first time. It was a bit weird for me, you know, what happened yesterday, so I wanted not to be at home.

Samer: oh no, no no, listen, I am a guest here and I think if I make you leave your house, then I should be the one leaving. I will go…

Me: no, you shouldn’t go. I didn’t mean it like that. What I meant is that I needed alone time to understand what is going on here.

Samer: but I thought you understood what was going on and that you accepted my dick yesterday because of it.

Me: listen, Samer, me being gay, or anyone else being gay for that matter, doesn’t automatically mean taking anything that is offered…

Samer: don’t condescend me with your explanations, I know what gay is and what it means. And that is why I say that I am not gay.

Me: well, honestly, I don’t care how you identify yourself, but I am tell…

Samer: -interrupts me- what did you just say? How I identify myself? I’m an Arab and I’m a Muslim. There is no gay in Arab and Muslim world. Do you know what gay means to me? It means a non Muslim that offers his ass and mouth. Yesterday I thought you understood that I will use you for this because of what you are.

Me: wait so it’s a race and religion thing?!

Samer: yes. You are a good friend to me and for this I respect you, but you are also white, gay and Christian. And to me you are perfect to take care of my needs because I cannot respect you sexually. I see you as weak as a woman.

Me: what?! You sticking your dick in my mouth yesterday was pretty g…

Samer: -interrupts me- shut up! You will respect me now. I will show you what a man is, you fucking white bitch.

He grabbed me and threw me against the kitchen sink. I tried to resist but I was already rock hard as well. He pushed me and bended me against the dining table, and held my hands with his hand while lowering my pants and underwear. He touched my hard dick and laughed but said nothing. At that moment he knew I was into this, that he started to tame me. And the worst thing is that I knew this too, and I fucking loved it. I heard him spit on his hand and felt his wet thumb on my asshole, pushing his spit in my hole, making it moist for him. In that moment, even though I was unable to move and about to be fucked without consent, I have felt so amazingly free and turned on. Just the fact that my ass makes him hard, makes me hard as well. And the fact that he will find his pleasure and relief in me was liberating. I had the sexiest man I’ve ever seen, standing behind me, getting himself ready to penetrate me. All of a sudden, I feel a thrust coming up my ass, and it was his dick, going all the way in. The pain, it was so intense that it was absolutely breathtaking. I shouted in pain, but he just kept going, fucking my ass like a mad man.

Samer: you fucking white pussy, you can’t even take a dick properly without screaming. Fuck, you have no dignity, don’t you?

As I turned my head around to him, he slapped me.

Samer: answer me bitch, I asked you a question!

Me: no, I have no dignity.

Samer: yeah, you are nothing, say it.

Me: I am nothing.

As I answered, I’ve felt so degraded, and with this feeling the pain in my ass turned into the weirdest pleasure. He violently ****d me, and I was enjoying it. I was enjoying him. He slammed his dick a few more times in me and pushed me really hard against the table, so hard that I could barely breathe. I knew he was getting ready to cum, but at that point I wanted to lower myself even more in his eyes so I started to moan like a girl.

Samer: that’s right, you slut, moan like a bitch.

Me: mmmmm ahhh

Samer: what are you? Say it?

Me: I’m a bitch…

Samer: and what do you need, bitch?

Me: I need a real man.

Samer: that’s right bitch. Who is a real man?

Me: you are, mmmm, you are.

Samer: you fucking whore, you will make me cum so hard.

I tried squeezing my ass a bit more for him, but it was pointless, he already wrecked it with his big Muslim cock. The pressure on my back was getting really hard and I knew this was it, he is going to cum at any moment now. I pushed my ass up a little bit and made it even more available for him to slam his dick balls deep. I could hear him breathe really heavily and his thrusts picked up a pace. He tightened his grip on me and started to pump his load in my ass pushing in really long thrusts. His grip softened and he leaned against my back. I could feel his chest hair wet from all the sweat and his heart pounding like crazy. I have just emptied his balls with my ass. He fucked me and he loved it.

He kept his dick in me until it went soft and fell out on its own, while he rested on top of me a bit. He then stood up, and went to take a shower. I’ve cleaned myself and the table a bit, and went to sit on the sofa. When he came back from the shower it felt as if nothing has happened just a few minutes ago. He smiled, sat next to me and turned on the TV.

Me: do you want to watch a movie or something?

Samer: sure. But hey, what’s for lunch?

It felt kinda natural, this weird life started to get a somewhat clearer shape. As I went to the kitchen to make us some food, I could feel his eyes on me.

Samer: you know, I like this a lot.

Me: I do too.