Bacha bazi: The horrible reason why Afghan men often have sex with men?

Jan 25, 2023 | 21 comments

Bacha bazi, or “boy play,” is a traditional practice in Afghanistan in which older men, known as “bache baz,” take young boys, known as “bacha boys,” as their sexual partners. The bacha boys are typically between the ages of 9 and 15 and are dressed in women’s clothing to dance for the entertainment of men at parties and other gatherings.

The practice is rooted in Afghan culture and has a long history, but it has been widely condemned as a form of sexual exploitation and abuse of children. Despite being illegal, it continues to be widely practiced in many parts of the country, particularly in rural areas.

Bacha boys are often taken from poor families and are promised a better life and the opportunity to earn money for their families. However, they are often subjected to sexual abuse and violence, and many suffer from physical and psychological trauma as a result.

The practice of bacha bazi also contributes to the fact that many Afghan men have sex with men. The men who engage in bacha bazi often consider themselves heterosexual, and the practice is not seen as a sign of homosexuality in Afghan culture. However, the sexual abuse of boys can lead to confusion and trauma for the boys, and can contribute to the development of same-sex attraction and behavior in some men.

The seclusion of girls and women in Afghanistan is a traditional practice that has been in place for centuries. In traditional Afghan society, women were expected to be confined to the private sphere, with little interaction with men outside of their immediate family. This practice, known as “purdah,” is still widely practiced in many parts of the country today.

This has had a significant impact on men’s sexuality in Afghanistan as well. Men in traditional Afghan society are not exposed to women in a sexual context before marriage. Therefore, many men lack the knowledge and experience of how to interact with women in a sexual manner which can lead to difficulties in sexual relationships and sexual dysfunctions.

Additionally, the seclusion of women can also contribute to the development of same-sex attraction and behavior in some men. The lack of access to women can lead men to turn to other men for sexual gratification. This is particularly true in settings where men are isolated from women, such as in prisons or in the military.

The practice of bacha bazi is a serious human rights issue that needs to be addressed by the Afghan government and the international community. Efforts should be made to educate the public about the harms of the practice, and to provide support and assistance to the bacha boys and their families. Additionally, steps should be taken to prosecute those who engage in bacha bazi and to provide protection and support to the victims.

The very topic of Afghan immigrant men having casual sexual relationships with white men while married to women is a complex and sensitive issue that requires a nuanced understanding of the cultural, social, and economic factors that contribute to it.

In many traditional Afghan societies, men are expected to be the providers and protectors of their families. As a result, they may feel pressure to present a traditional, heterosexual image to their communities, even if they have same-sex desires or engage in same-sex behavior. This can lead to a disconnect between the public and private lives of Afghan immigrant men, with some men engaging in casual sexual relationships with white men while still maintaining a traditional, heterosexual identity in their communities.

Furthermore, many Afghan immigrants who come to the West face many challenges including cultural and linguistic barriers, discrimination, and economic insecurity. These difficulties can lead to feelings of isolation and a desire for connection and acceptance, which may contribute to the development of casual sexual relationships with white men.


So, one would ask themself, where does this deep fascination with white skin complexity come from?
The answer lies, again, in Afghan culture, as the association of lighter skin with femininity is a longstanding and deeply ingrained societal belief. This belief is rooted in historical and cultural perceptions of beauty and femininity, as well as a complex set of socio-economic and political factors.

Historically, in Afghanistan, lighter skin was seen as a sign of beauty and femininity. This is because it was associated with the upper classes, who had the leisure time and resources to avoid sun exposure and maintain a lighter complexion. In contrast, darker skin was associated with working outdoors and was therefore seen as a marker of lower social status and masculinity.

Additionally, the cultural influences of neighboring countries, such as Persia and India, have also contributed to the belief that lighter skin is more attractive. In these cultures, lighter skin is often associated with nobility, wealth, and beauty. These cultural influences have been reinforced through centuries of intermarriage and trade, and have played a significant role in shaping Afghan perceptions of beauty and femininity. This belief is also reinforced by the media, where light skin is often portrayed as more attractive and desirable. This is particularly true in Bollywood movies, which are widely watched in Afghanistan, where the lead actors are often light skinned.

In conclusion, there are a lot of stereotypes and cultural wrongs that have played their role in producing this situation. At the end of the day, each and every one of us is living their life at least a little bit according to stereotypes. We are lusting over a certain group of men, and they are seemingly lusting over us. Are the reasons for it wrong? Sure, they are! But if they are working well for the both sides, there is nothing wrong with it.

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: The editing team of IC doesn’t support any romantic feelings towards minors, as well as any sexual acts or depictions of them. We are believing strongly that the Bacha bazi tradition is wrong and this article is in no way glorifying it, but exposing it for what it is, and how it connects to certain patterns that we as non-Afghans can potentially recognise.


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